the prodigal's father

dear emily,

hans was sharing with me his perspective of the prodigal son.  it
was moving to understand the love the father demonstrated by
allowing his son to leave and then squander the fortune he had
worked a lifetime to share with him.

i guess, to a certain extent, every parent has to do that.  we birth
these precious babies, nurture them, and teach them everything
that is important to us.

then they decide what is important to them.

sometimes it feels like they are trampling on our hearts, but usually
it is just their stomping around the corral, hoping to jump the fence
and run their own race.

letting them go is an act of love as surely as rocking them to sleep
was.  believing that they are in the "palm of His hand," is an act
of faith.  rejoicing in the meantime is proof of my faith.

love,
lea

"though the fig tree does not bud and
there are no grapes on the vines,

though the olive crop fails
and the fields produce no food,

though there are no sheep in the pen
and no cattle in the stalls,

yet i will rejoice in the Lord,
i will be joyful in God my Savior."
habakkuk 3: 17-18

ps.  this is a repost from this time last year.

i read like most men

as i was enjoying the company of my extended family, we began

discussing the books we were reading.  to my dismay but not 

surprise, i didn't care much about the books the ladies were 

reading.  i can't name a single nicholas sparks' character.

the men, however, were reading all my favorite living authors.

we were soon debating which hollywood actor could possibly 

fill the shoes of mitch rapp, vince flynn's action hero.   daniel 

craig was my favorite, brad pitt being too feminine, george 

clooney too not sean connery, and liam neeson a little too big.

while we were extolling  the amazing feats of mitch rapp, i was

secretly thinking about jack reacher, lee child's giant hearted and

sized protagonist.  liam neeson, of course!

i have learned a great deal from jack reacher.  as my family was
elevating the eiffel tower, i whispered the "12 ways to identify a
terrorist."  i also know now that it is better to "say nothing," and
if you have to fight more than one bad guy at a time, "identify the
ringleader, the one who does all the talking.  hit him first and
hard.  the others will think twice."

  

if you're worried that i am fantasizing about a fictional hero, you

are dead wrong.  i want to BE him.

what did you say???

love,

lea

"be strong and courageous.  do not be terrified;   do not be

discouraged, for the Lord thy God is with you."  joshua 1:9

light and shadow

dear emily,

as  i watch the dark shadows steal across the valley, i'm tempted
to assign them a malignant motive.  their corresponding clouds
might 'rain on' my lupine trail hike.  on the other hand, they could
bring sweet relief from the penetrating sun.  

i can understand God as light but often struggle with the shadow
part.

do you remember baby jessica, the 18 month old who fell into
an eight inch well?  she spent two days in that dark shaft, while
the rest of the world watched in horror.  at one point her only
hope was from a man born without collar bones.  his question
"why was i born like this?" was answered by a baby girl.

were his frameless shoulders light or shadow?

many turn from their Creator, because they cannot reconcile
tragedy with His sovereignty or mercy.   why do bad things
happen to good people?  i certainly don't know, because i wasn't
there when He "laid the earth's foundation. . . while the morning
stars sang together and all the angels shouted for joy." (job 38)

i cringe and cower at life's dark moments but have found that
questioning the Lord's motives to be futile.  that approach seems
childlike to philosophers and wise men, but from my baby eyes i
have seen and learned wondrous things.   the shadows are often
my place of refuge.  (psalm 91)

love,
lea

with what feature do you lead?

i just finished tracy chevalier's remarkable creatures and found it
to be unremarkable but loved the perceptive introduction of her
characters.  she maintains that ones leading feature reveals ones
dominant characteristic.

her protagonist, mary anning, "leads with her eyes. . . that are
button brown and bright, and have a fossil hunter's tendency to
look for something."  her father enters with "his sharp, shapely
nose pinning her to the spot like a dart."

the heart breaker of the book, colonel birch, has such a thick,
wavy head of hair that he is always bowing to show it off.   "i
have never trusted a man who leads with his hair."

i lead with the proverbial big toe, testing the temperature of the
water before i jump in.

when we were newlyweds, we had no idea how many children
we wanted.  we took them one at a time and enjoyed them so
much, they just kept right on coming.  we have been visiting a
rustic colorado mountain town for 25 years and cherish every
visit.  my husband has asked me many times if i would like to
have a home there, but i have declined.

but, four or five years ago, i agreed . . . to a tiny condo on the
side of the mountain to just put in my big toe.  it has been the
most joyful experience since having all those babies, so now we
have built a cabin on the top of a ridge, surrounded by the
mountains we love.  i guess we have jumped in with both feet.

"how lovely on the mountains are the feet of them who bring
good news."   isaiah 52:7

with what feature do you lead?

love,
lea

ps.  this is an edited repost from one year ago.

in the trenches

dear emily,

there has been no rain for 7 days, and my newly planted trees are
distressed from the sun and wind.  since i have no outside water
source yet, i have been filling a bucket from the nearby pond and
lugging it to each tree.  not a practical way to water, but it might
help my flabby arms.

this morning i dug tiny trenches from the stream to each tree.   it
was lovely watching the water escape its boundary and become  a
new tributary winding its way to my poor dry trees.   also, once i
became good and muddy, i began to have more fun.  my little dog
kept looking up at me as if to say, "does your mom know what
we're doing?"

love,
lea

"for I will pour water on the thirsty land,
and streams on the dry ground;
I will pour out my Spirit on your offspring,
and my blessing on your descendants.

they will will spring up like grass in a meadow,
like poplar trees by flowing streams."
isaiah 44:3,4

time flies

my very wise son, isaac, remarked recently that it's not just fun
stuff that makes time fly but activities that consume us.   he was
using the illustration of taking a test that required all his
attention and realizing that four hours passed so quickly.

he wouldn't exactly call that test, 'fun', but the time sure flew.

today i scrubbed, made beds, and organized my home for hours,
but it sped by like minutes.  the back of my hands are sore and
chafed, but i didn't even notice them when it happened.

i feel full, fat, and happy, but none if it was really 'fun'.

why do we seek  'fun' so desperately?  it would be better to 

search for good, hard work that yields satisfying results, i think.  or better yet do what our Lord so beautifully urged, "seek first His kingdom and His 

righteousness, and all these things will be added . . . " mt. 6:33

i always wanted to say "selah",
lea

in the bag

dear emily,

i love to read what famous women carry in their purses, partly
for ideas to make my life more fabulous :)  but mostly out of
curiosity.

katy perry's bag contains 'diva' nails, sunglasses, la mer face
cream (my favorite), and her own perfume, "katy perry."

jennifer aniston includes bobbi brown cheek tint, chanel lip
gloss, loreal nutrileum serum, and her own perfume, "jennifer
aniston."

hillary clinton carries chili flakes, a medical kit, and mineral
water mist.  what?  no "hillary clinton" perfume?

my favorite is helen mirren's . . . reading glasses and I.D.  you
gotta' love her.

isn't it revealing, really, what we carry in our bags?  mine
always contains socks for my frigid feet, lip gloss for my dry
lips, moisturizer for my dehydrated wrinkles, and a teeny bible
for my cold, hard heart.   my father in law gave me 50 of these
25 years ago.

so, what's in your wallet?

love,
lea

"as water reflects a face, so a man's heart reflects the man."
proverbs 27:19