peace in our hearts and homes

dear emily,

it used to tickle me when people would say, at social events,
"you have FIVE children?  how can you be so peaceful?"

"umm, maybe because they aren't here with me!"

but truly, our home was peaceful.  my nature required it,
and so i worked very hard to nurture it.  hans and i didn't
raise our voices at each other or the children and didn't
allow them to do that, either.  we encouraged happy play
that didn't cross the bridge to wild, loud chaos.

the only real enemy of peace was fear.  sometimes it would
sneak up and seize me like a mad dog.  "you're a terrible
mother, you can't do this, or your baby isn't going to make
it through the night!"

a few weeks before shelby was born, i was paralyzed with
dread that we might lose her.  her big brother, isaac, had
not been expected to live after he was born, and i couldn't
face that again.

hans' mom, my junior high sunday school teacher, did not
tolerate my fearful behavior. "God has not give you a spirit
of fear, but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind!"
2 timothy 1:7

in other words, "snap out of it!"

or, as Jesus always used to say, "peace!"

love,
lea

bizarro blog

for some reason my silly computer reposted the 'spanking' post
for today.  i wrote it days ago!   just don't read it.  i'm certainly
not going to...

to spank or not to spank

dear emily,

this is going to be a bit tricky, because i know many people are very
opposed to spanking, but i wanted you to know how we handled it.

when our children reached a certain age and willfully disobeyed
us, they received a spanking.  our motivation was primarily their
safety.  when we said, "don't run into the street or touch the stove,"
they knew we meant it.

we also wanted to be able to take them lots of fun places and
not terrorize the people around us.  we have had waitresses
run after us and say, "those are the best behaved children i have
ever seen."  hard working people deserve respectful behavior.

the children were never, ever spanked for childishness,
accidental spills, or roughhousing, etc.   those kinds of deeds
received timeouts, removal of privileges, or simply cleanups.

i'm sure there are parents who have successfully raised happy,
confident, respectful kids, having never spanked them.  i just
don't personally know any.

i also know that spankings can quickly turn the ugly corner
to abuse, which is heartbreaking and despicable.

not long ago, when all the kids were home, i lamented that we
ever spanked them.  shelby looked at me in horror and said,
"mom, i hate to think what we would be like if you hadn't!"

"the Lord disciplines and chastens those He loves,"(heb. 12:6)
 is not exactly a refrigerator verse, but we don't get to pick and
choose the easy ones when we choose to follow Him.

love,
lea

mushroom soup

dear emily,

this is NOT a food blog.  whenever i call out, "time for dinner!"
my kids, husband, and westie run to hide.  while reading a new
recipe,  my imaginative side thinks it can improve it just a little
bit by adding...something it shouldn't have.

on the other hand, i occasionally, serendipitously create some
yummy dishes, that i, of course, can never remember to make
again.  not this time!

i sauteed a yellow onion until it was tender and sweet in olive
oil, seasoning, and a sprinkle of red pepper flakes for punch.
(do NOT expect a wonderful picture here.  those are on the
pioneer woman's blog.  she knows what she is doing)

then i diced up a purple potato, the only kind i had, into 1/4
inch pieces. i sauteed them with the onion a few minutes,
turned off the burner and covered the pot for a long time...
time enough to write three thank you notes, put away the
laundry, skype with sunday, and exchange funny messages
with hailey on facebook.

when i looked into the pot, the potatoes were almost tender,
so i turned the heat back onto low and threw  in a ton of sliced
portabella mushrooms, two  big handfuls.  i was a little worried
that the mushrooms wouldn't like the potatoes' strange color.

once the mushrooms were cooked, i tossed everything into a
processor, mushed them up, poured them back into the pot,
and added lots of milk and cream.  delicious!  didn't look one
bit purple, just nice and mushroomy, which hans loved...a
lot!

love,
lea

snow!

dear emily,

i'm sitting at my cozy kitchen table sipping a yummy home
made chai latte, trying not to let the ingredients spoil the
pleasure.  you can't imagine how much sugar and frothy
milk make your starbucks' latte taste so delicious.

the lovely soft snow falling outside my kitchen windows
completes the setting.  oh my gosh, i sound like barbara
stanwyck from "christmas in connecticut!"



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because we have had such a big winter storm, my friend
d. is bringing me a rick of firewood.  you probably know
her, she is that spiritual tornado, who forces you to 'walk
the walk'.  she and her husband have recently taken in an
alcoholic father and son.  they now attend three celebrate
recovery meetings a week and help his thirteen year old
with homework at all other times!

she makes the father chop wood for his keep, hence my
rick of wood.  rebecca dunning wrote a moving piece
in today's "24/7" journal, entitled 'think global/act local!'
they have camps of people without jobs in colorado,
holding up signs saying, "we need jobs, propane, food,
and water." her husband just delivered a rick of wood to
them.

sounds like d.!

this is making me feel a little guilty about my latte.
"wash me and i will be whiter than snow."  isaiah 51:7

love,
lea

principles in peril?

dear emily,

hans and i had a disagreement about whether we would lay
down our principles in order to save our children. he is a man
of such integrity and honor that he could not fathom doing it.

i, on the other hand, said that i feared what i might be able to
do in protecting my children.  i promptly went through the ten
commandments in my mind and thought, "yep, i am capable
of breaking everyone, even making little idols of my little ones."

something transpired in my meek heart, once i had that first
baby;  a lioness replaced the lamb who had always ruled there.
i need the Lord to continually draw me near to keep her claws
under His rule.

when two women were fighting over a baby, king solomon
wisely said, "let's just cut it in half, and you can share him."
the authentic mother cried out at the thought and was willing
to give him up rather than injure him.

i cringe to think of giving up any of my precious ones, but i
need to be willing to do that, too, if it would save them from
harm.

so, here's a question:  what is the most extreme thing YOU would
be willing to do in order to save or feed your children?

love,
lea

a living hero of the faith

dear emily,

hebrews 11 lists many of the heroes who have gone before us.
my family has one walk in our front door three days a week.
miss edna came to us ten years ago, and i do not know what
we ever did without her.

the Lord's Spirit goes before, after her, and all throughout the
house.  His Name is continually lifted up in the kitchen, living
room, hallways, and stairs.  heated arguments dissolve when
they hear, "Jesus" sung from the rafters.

fifteen years ago, miss edna adopted her niece's ten day old
baby.  the mommy was in prison, and the baby had been
shifted from foster parent to foster parent.  now he is a big,
strapping young man who plays in the band.  my dad helped
him learn to read by the strangest coincidence.

since then, miss edna has adopted three of his little brothers
from the same crack addicted mother.  all suffered from
some degree of withdrawal, but the latest baby the most.
it was just heartbreaking to see a week old baby, shivering
and arching his back from his mother's addiction.

sometimes she brings them here to our delight.  loston (ten)
consistently beats me at chess.  the last time the babies came,
my girls were just in stitches to hear little isaiah (two) saying
to his baby brother willis (one), "hush, willis...hush, willis."

whenever i ask miss edna if she's ready to stop working here,
she says, "oh no, i need a quiet place to come and rest!"  :)

she turned 64 today.

i bet paul mccartney never envisioned a sacrifice of love
so great as hers.

love,
lea