Tuesday, March 23, 2010

consistency

dear emily,

it has often occurred to me that when we are training our little
ones to be kind and good, we are really training ourselves.

there are many gadgets in our parenting tool belt, but consistency
is one of the most effective.   if i am unfailing to shine my light
on his bad language, for instance,  then my child will usually
upgrade his vocabulary.

on the other hand, if my ornery widget is not totally sure how i
will react, he will spout off the dirty words.  the fun of it is worth
the risk.  maybe i'll ignore it this time.

if we take advantage of that very short period of time in which
they want to please us, we can teach our children invaluable
life skills.  the key is our unswerving response.  we  need to
reinforce any kind and thoughtful gesture and correct the hurtful
or selfish ones.

sounds pretty easy, but those days that i don't feel well or just
don't want to get off the couch can sabotage me.  as nike says,
"just do it!"

or as Jesus says, "let your light shine . . . that they may see your
good deeds and praise your Father in heaven."  matthew 5:16

love,
lea

28 comments:

Brandy said...

Lea,

This is so true! Consistency is extremely important. And because children absorb everything, positive reinforcement is crucial.

I hope your week is off to a great start! :)

Brandy

Brandy said...

Lea,

This is so true! Consistency is extremely important. And because children absorb everything, positive reinforcement is crucial.

I hope your week is off to a great start! :)

Brandy

Barbara said...

Hi! Lea

Nice to meet you, Thanks for visiting and commenting.

Just scrolled through a number of your posts and see you have an interesting and unusual way of writing your posts.

Good content too.

Patrina said...

"if we take advantage of that very short period of time in which
they want to please us, we can teach our children invaluable
life skills. the key is our unswerving response. we need to
reinforce any kind and thoughtful gesture and correct the hurtful
or selfish ones."

TRUE TRUE TRUE!!

Great words of wisdom, Lea.

Also, YES!!! you did get the problem fixed on my side bar! In faCT, YOU WENT FROM THE BOTTOM TO THE TOP !! Seeee how that worked??

Thanks for responding to let me know - but truth is - I saw you at the top before you let me know! Powerful illustration about LIFE, don't ya think?

Blessings neighbor.
Patrina <")>><
His watchman on the wall

Aubrey said...

It's nice to be reminded about the importance of consistency from someone other than my own parents. :)

Can't wait to see you!

someplace in thyme said...

Consistency is indeed the key, but this is not easy. I also put love and understanding right up there with it. Parenting is indeed the most precious gift of yourself there is. It is also the hardest job on the planet, the one you can never walk away from, no matter what age, Char

Amy said...

Thank you for sharing the wisdom. I really try to be consistent but sometimes it is easy to just say "oh well, I will catch it next time." I needed the reminder.

myletterstoemily said...

patrina, thanks for the encouragement
to fix my blog site feed!

aubrey, you're doing great!...and listen
to your mother. :)

~*~ saskia ~*~ said...

Wise Wisdom, Lea!

Oh yes, we do have tulips but only in the stores :o)
As a matter of fact the green is already popping out, it will not take long anymore before the beautiful flowers to show. We also have the windmills, de yellow wooden shoes and orange, to be our National color ;o)
In case you would love to see a lot of tulips and many many others, click:www.keukenhof.com
De Keukenhof is pretty famous in the Netherlands. Many travelers visit de Keukenhof....
Have a lovely day, Lea! xo

carissa @ lowercase letters said...

so well said! i love this part: we can teach our children invaluable life skills... the key is our unswerving response. wow. i need to always remember this. may the Lord strengthen me to be unwavering as i raise our children! thanks for this grand advice.

Joan Elizabeth said...

Your site feed is fixed ... terrific, you are no longer languishing at the bottom. Consistency, an important thought.

Jo said...

Consistency is probably the most important thing in being a parent. That's the only way children know where they stand. I think consistency also makes children feel safe.

I have a feeling you're a good mommy. :-)

A Tale of Two Cities said...

Lea,
Just a note to say how mush I enjoy your words of wisdom--such nuggets of truth. If you ever collected all of these together, they'd make a great daily devotional book.

Debi

Beansieleigh said...

Hi Lea! Always a pleasure, an inspiration, a sense of reassurance, and sometimes even a gentle reminder to some of us, to read your posts! ~tina

elaine @ peace for the journey said...

Today I ventured into a closet I hadn't been in for a long time with the idea of sortin' and pitchin' at the forefront of my mind. I came across the one and only parenting book I've kept over the years (don't believe much in them). It's Kevin Leman's "Making Children Mind without Losing Yours." Bar none, the most helpful common-sense tricks of the trade every parent should use. I did, and it worked. It's pages are worn and yellow and dog-eared after all these years...

Maybe it needs a re-read. After all, I'm doing it all over again. Remind me why, please?!

peace~elaine

Maryjane - The Beehive Cottage said...

Hello Lea,

Thank you for your visit to my blog! So glad you did! You have a inspiring blog that touches the heart!

Hugs,
Maryjane

Megan said...

Oh so true!

I think consistency is the key to almost everything in parenthood.

And when the battle of the wills ensues...I remind myself...

I am the Mommy and I WILL WIN!!

:-)

Megan

http://reddirtandcrazy.blogspot.com/

zach+kate said...

i agree...but it doesn't sound easy at all :) thank you for the encouraging words.

Susan at Charm of the Carolines said...

Excellent. I wish all parents felt this way.

Susan

Betsy from Tennessee said...

Neat blog Lea.... Emily must be very special. I hope/know that you can help her. Afterall --you have been there/done that. Right??????

I raised 3 sons and now have 5 grands. My life wasn't easy back then since I got a divorce after 20 yrs. of marriage. BUT---consistency is definitely a MUST when raising kids. Another of my favorite words is COMMUNICATION. Talk to them--and get them to talk to you. That helps SO much.

Thanks for visiting my blog, Lea. Hope you come back often.
Hugs,
Betsy

Mmm said...

so true about consistency. Good words to live by for certain.

Staci Danford said...

Amen.. I 100% agree that of all the things a parent can do being CONSISTANT is the most important thing.. Great Post.
Staci

koralee said...

Great message..I so agree with you!I love how you write. Have a great evening and thanks for visiting me. xo

Shannon said...

So true!!!

Vicki said...

Trying to do a fast catch up on things this morning and scrolled down a bit to see what I've missed...which was a lot of good posts! I need to get to work but wanted to say hello...keep kissing the dolphins!

Deborah Ann said...

I worked with autistic kids for a while. I wish I would have done that before I raised my kids. I wasn't consistent back in the day. Oh well, I have my grandkids to help raise now, and these days I'm more consistent and use positive reinforcement all the time. Who knows, maybe they'll turn out better than the last batch!

Serendipity is Sweet said...

This is so very true...especially the part about it being very difficult to accomplish some days, lol. Still, more than worth every effort...

What a lovely blog you have!

Angela said...

"it has often occurred to me that when we are training our little
ones to be kind and good, we are really training ourselves."

I can't tell you the time I am with the wee ones in my daycare and this comes to my mind..How I AM learning as I teach them. Learning to be kind, gentle, loving, patient, 'happy heart' as I tell the children...

Your blog is beautiful and filled with such godly wisdom...

Thank you so much for stopping by and praying for those that have shared on Fearless Friday...

Blessing to you and yours.