Friday, September 20, 2013

how will we know?

dear emily,

how will we know if we have raised our children well?    there are many
litmus tests, but i like the kindness test the best.

  • how do they treat the dog when no one is looking?
  • who do they prefer, the high and mighty or the underdog? (sensing a dog theme here)
  • are they generous to those in need?
  • what do i feel when they leave,  relief or sadness?

sadness, always sadness.   

our oldest son and his precious wife have been living with us for nine months
while they have been remodeling a home.   tonight they spend the first night 
in their own house, and i'm feeling just like i did when he  left for college.
but that unhappy feeling is laced with gratitude and hope.   i hope they visit 
often, and i'm grateful that, because they were such thoughtful houseguests,  
i don't feel one bit relieved that they're leaving.

well, i guess i could say that i'm relieved he grew up so kind.


"be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in 
Christ God forgave you."  ephesians 4:32


Elizabeth Day said...

Lea, how blessed are we to have sons we are so proud of! Our son and his family lived with us for a year following Katrina, and what a blessing that time was for us, and I believe for them as well. He is everything we prayed for and more. Thanks for sharing this beautiful testimony.

Sonja Goodson said...

Oh I hear you on this one. I am still sad when mine leave, and yet so happy at the people they have become. I understand everything you said. :)

Sandy said...

I know exactly how you feel, Lea. Our youngest son and his wife have been living in our downstairs apartment for several months while they prepared to leave next month for a year long work/play time in New Zealand. I am already missing them so much and feeling very teary and they have not even left yet. A whole year! Seth still seems like my little boy sitting on the floor playing with all of his Legos. Oh, my how hard it is to let them go so far away! I wish your son and his wife well.

Vee said...

That is sweet... May they enjoy the comforts of a home of their own. And I think that they should invite you to dinner very soon!

Bree said...

Lea, how precious you were able to open your home to them and your weren't "relieved" when they left. Happy fall to you, dear :)
Big hugs

Cinnamon said...

What a sweet post. I love your questions. As I get older (and more children leave) I am learning to love the now even when it is hard and thank God for the good, for He is always generous.

Do you know I think of you and Sunday so often. Our kiddos are singing more and more. Often making up their own songs. Such a sweet sound to fall asleep to - my children singing about God's mercy!


Debbie said...

Oh I spend a whole year living with an adult child and his wife PROVES you have raised a kind, considerate and wonderful man. Happy he has his own home now to go to, and happy for you to have had him there for that extra time!

Farm Girl said...

Very well said, and oh so sweet.

Janette's Sage/Simply Your Decor said... have done well!! Enjoy the fruit of your labor.

Auntie Cake said...

I am always sad when my daughter goes back to school. I know what you are feeling, I can imagine what fun you must all have had together. We lived with my parents while building our house. I don't know about my parents, but my kids want to move back in with them. They have way better food!

I drove past my son riding his motorcycle without his helmet. I had a friend who is a cop call his cell phone and pretend to get my son in trouble. I have to give my son credit for being very respectful to the police! Sadly, my friend said he doesn't run into many teen-ager's who are polite and respectful while he is getting them in trouble.

Enjoy the fall weekend!

Lisa said...

I know they are excited to move back into their house! What a blessing you got to share this time with them.:)

Susy said...

I'm catching up on your posts, and must tell you I enjoy viewing life through your lens. You're a blessing. xo

Thistle Cove Farm said...

it sounds the twig is bent as the tree grew...kindness begets kindness and you and your husband raised your son well.

Cheri Bunch said...

Hi Leah,
I've missed you!
You always make me smile!

Anita said...

As a mother of 3 teens, I need reminders of the most important goals in child rearing, such as what you've said in this post.

So much emphasis is on success, as in great educations, great jobs, and great money. While I wish that for my girls, I mainly want them to be peaceful, kind, giving, and content with their choices and lives.

I'm glad you got that bonus time with your son and his wife.

Chris said...

Hi Leah, just stopping by to say how delightful your blog is. Thanks so much for sharing. I have recently found your blog and am now following you, and will visit often. Please stop by my blog and perhaps you would like to follow me also. Have a wonderful day. Hugs, Chris

Cindy said...

I love that test...kindness. It's the consistent comment I've received from my kids' teachers and other adults who know/knew them - that they are nice to others. :)