Tuesday, January 26, 2010

to spank or not to spank, comments

for some reason, people were not able to leave comments
on the spanking post.  i really want to hear what you think
about this, since it is could be very helpful to young moms.

so,  please just comment here.  thank you!

15 comments:

Anonymous said...

This is a test comment. How are you Lea?
Michelle
Shabby Creations

Thoughts on Life and Millinery. said...

I have to laugh a bit about the spank/not to spank debate. I was a great one for setting my children down, and at great length explaining what they had done wrong, how it made me feel, how such behavior would affect their lives and the lives around them, how God said such-and-such in the Bible etc etc etc...

BOTH of my adult children have told me how much the HATED my long winded lectures and how much they sincerely had wished I would have just spanked them and been done with it!

(And yes, they got spanked for willful disobedience and disrespect. One time I had to chase my son outside to catch his for his punishment; he ran around the corner and into another door then locked me out! Ohhhh...I really did need the time outside to cool down after that little trick. It would have been murder if I could of gotten inside right away!)

myletterstoemily said...

'thoughts': lol! my mother in law used to chase her five boys all over
the house!

Margaret said...

This single lady isn't touching the topic, but it does bring a quote from Princess Grace to mind... "When Caroline was little, it seemed like I spanked her every other day. Albert didn't need as much. A sharp word was enough. Stephanie? I should have been beating her like a gong long ago."

Anonymous said...

My 2 cents worth, I only spanked the girls when I knew that they had comptempt for authority and did not obey the rules. In other words they did willingly what they knew they could not do. So they suffered the consequences for their actions. Prov.13-24 was the course of action. He who spares his rod hates his son, But he who loves him diciplines promptly. If it is the word of God they I needed to apply it for their sake. Prov. 23:14, You shall beat him with a rod, and deliver his sould from hell. Wow, strong and to the point. Translation used New King James. Love your blog Lea.

Anonymous said...

My husband and I spank. We have agreed to keep it at a max of three swats for now (kids are 5, 3 and 1). We vary in our use of punishment, anything from time-outs, to keeping from them the thing that they wanted, to spanking. I was spanked, as was my husband and neither of us feel bitter towards our parents for that. Sometimes I wish there was another way when I have to slap my one-year-old's hand for hitting his older sister...it seems hypocritical...yet, when they are 1 and you can't reason with them, or give them a time out, what else do you do? I am glad that I can diversify punishments with my two older children, it's much easier. We tend to reserve spankings for the purposefully causing of harm to someone else and willfully disobeying. We have very strong willed children and I don't see how we could get through to them without a little bit of tough love!

myletterstoemily said...

thanks so much for your wise comments, everybody! should give
young moms some food for thought, not from a book writtent by
a single man! :)

margaret, you almost made me fall out of my chair laughing!

The Feathered Nest said...

Such wonderful comments on this subject!!! I, too, and my husband, have raised five wonderful sons ~ but had it not been for spanking...only in the case of blatant disobedience...our boys would not be the respectful, loving men they have become. Yes, discipline according to the offense, and the personality of the child. Sometimes even a look can change a child's mind! One thing our boys always knew is that we loved them enough to care how they behaved ~ and now they receive compliments for their behavior! xxoo, Dawn

myletterstoemily said...

five sons! you must be an angel! and so proud of them!

Uncanny Colleen said...

Thank you for visiting my blog, Lea!

We are in the thick of raising our four sons, ages 7, 5, 4 and 1 year old. We only spank when there is willful disobedience and defiance. We use a 'sebet', which is the Hebrew word for 'rod' (as in, spare the rod...spoil the child). We heard a speaker talking about the sebet and it's characteristics. It was evidently about 1/4 inch thick and between 24 and 30 inches long. It would sting like crazy, but would break before you could ever do any physical harm.

So, I made a quick trip to the hardware store and purchased a length of 1/4" dowel rod. It only takes one or two swats to carry the intended message!

However, we rarely have to use it. Like some of the other comments, we use other methods (like extra chores) when it is necessary to correct bad habits (consistently placing a cup perilously close to the edge of table and of course, NOT FLUSHING!!!) or silly accidents.

MotherPie said...

Willful disobedience is the key. And I kept wooden spoons in the kitchen so that I had to "go" get them, putting somewhat of a spacer/breather between the consequence and my doing it and NEVER used my hand.

Thanks for the comment on my blog. I've put you on my Bloglines (you have two others subscribed) so I can follow you on a regular basis. Your design is really good, graphically.

B. Bird is our mutual friend.

Can't imagine, AT ALL, homeschooling five. (sigh). But empty nest is.so.nice.
Cheers, MotherPie

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